Young love...50 years later

Take a look at this picture. What do you see? 

If you said an old man past his prime hitting on three women even further past their prime, you're right. This old boy stepped into the store not too long ago for reasons I can't remember (most likely to buy a six pack of bud light and ask where the nearest mini-golf course was). These fine ladies happened to be there at the same time, buying muffins and crackers and going about the general business of the upper-middle-aged. One look at them, and he was lovestruck.

After he bought his goods, he asked me some generic question about the area (where is the park entrance?, do you have cigars?, how can I see the mountain?...I could go on...). While I was in the middle of my equally generic answer, he politely cut me off and informed me he was done with me, and was now concentrating on the beautiful women in the store. I took a look around the place, didn't see anything remotely resembling beautiful, and quietly accepted the fact that this man was either off his rocker or in a decade-long drought. Either way, I wasn't going to argue with him, so I let him stand there at the counter and try to strike up a conversation with the ladies for a few minutes (judging by his game, I'm leaning toward the decade-long drought option). 

They eventually grew tired of this and left the store. As you can see in the picture, he promptly followed them out and continued spitting mad game. I hope the four of them are very happy together.

I feel like you need to know these things.

Denim shirts.

I may have mentioned before that at the shit job we work, the Lynx Creek Store (or simply gas station...if you want to call it what it is), we are required to wear denim shirts. At first, I laughed it off as part of the job. After months of wearing them five days a week, however, the humor has died completely. It's not funny; it blows. Anyone who has ever been forced to wear one knows what I'm talking about, so for the love of God I'm hoping none of you do. 

But seriously, sometimes I wonder what the appeal of a denim shirt is. Why would anyone in their right mind want their employees to wear jeans on their upper bodies. Is it casual or dressy? I would say neither, only demeaning. What was wrong with a polo?

I picture a conversation between two Lynx Creek decision makers going something like this:

Person A: Okay, so the season is coming up, and we need to decide what the employees will be wearing this year.

Person B: Right. How about those nice casual dress shirts we had them wear last year? They seemed to like them.

A: No way. Those shirts were way too comfortable and nice-looking. We can't make that mistake again. Remember what we've got here: these kids are working a terribly boring and mundane job that they probably hate, we don't pay them shit, and they have to deal with crabby, wrinkled-up tourists all day. We're really screwing them over with this job, and we need a uniform that reflects that.

B: Of course, of course. We need to really suck the life out of these kids. Hmm...how about muscle shirts?

A: Could work. They look retarded, but some employees might enjoy the comfort and breathability. 

B: Can't have that. Say... leotards?

A: Better, closer, warmer...but I think we can do better yet.

B: Hey, here's an idea: why don't we take blue-jeans and make shirts out of them? They'll be uncomfortable, awkward, and completely stupid looking.

A: (pause while he thinks) Yes...YES! That's it! Make jeans into shirts...they'll hate it!

B: I'll get right on it. We can make them tuck them in and wear name tags, too.

A: I love my job.